is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
try to milk me bitch
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