Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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