Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
