You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
