his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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