How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Randomize
