drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
