I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
