I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
