addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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