I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize
