why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
