I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
So. Much. Porn.
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