just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
