Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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