Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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