Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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