I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize