Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize