playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
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