Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
