I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
