remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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