My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I can't turn off my feet"
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
