I love having hate sex.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize