is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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