Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Randomize
