how can u be prego again
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
this is an emotional support booty call
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
