i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize