He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
