Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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