Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
