wake up i wanna do it froggy style
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
sarcasm needs its own font
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize
