hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
