I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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