I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I got chris browned last night
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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