Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
