the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
