They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize