Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
