its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
