Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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