You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
