I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
And the cops told us we were all naked.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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