tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
