I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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