what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
