Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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