Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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