I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
