Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
